On the recommendation of a friend (after she listened to me blubber like a baby on the phone for half an hour), I've taken a break from my inductive study of the book of Titus and camped out in the Psalms. I decided to crawl up in my Daddy's lap, as it were, and soak his robe with my tears. I'm ashamed to admit how difficult it was for me to arrive at that decision. Why is that not the first plan of action when I'm feeling distant and dry and worthless?
Today, I read Psalm 22, referred to by some commentaries as "The Pslam of the Cross." David felt far from God. Jesus was far from God because He took my sin on Himself. I feel far from God, for reasons both known and unknown to me. I will press in and submit to whatever work He is pleased to do in me, and I will bear it proclaiming that He alone is worthy of praise.
I gave in to the wracking sobs that have been building for some time. The tears were hot and innumerable. I concluded that I really don't want to be anywhere other than where I am. I don't want to know anything except what it pleases the Lord to teach me. If I never have another warm, fuzzy feeling as long as I live, I will only glorify God who by His grace and for His glory created me, redeemed me and called me according to His purpose.
At present I am kept in peace as my mind is steadfast and my faith is firm.
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"The LORD is my strength and song, and He has become my salvation; This is my God, and I will praise Him; My father's God, and I will extol Him." Exodus 15:2
I have been there, Clemntine.
HE is faithful and just.
Love and hugs,
Diane
Thank you for posting this. I'm feeling a little dry, distant and worthless myself...
HUGS
I have been feeling this way lately too. I think it was last week that I finally had my breakdown and I have been camped at His feet since. A couple of years ago a friend told me something that I cling to during these times. Let me see if I can remember how she worded it lol...
Over the years, I've learned - when God seems silent and distant - it's not because my faith is weak - it's because it's stronger than it used to be. God is weaning us OFF of our feelings! He trusts us to just KNOW that he is there even in the silence. Our FAITH has grown to the point where God doesn't have to "show himself" or "prove His presence" to us every time we come to Him.
I will be lifting you in prayer and I hope you feel the hug of our Father today{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}
Exactly where He wants you to be. You are crying, and He is calling you to Him. Just the way it should be. Like any Daddy who sees His little girl hurting, He wants you in his lap where you can soak up His love. Stay put. Refresh. Grow strong.
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